Perfection Is the Enemy of Progress: Accepting the Grace of “Good Enough”

I waited until I was 37 to get married. Some would say I’m a late-bloomer, others would say I’m late to the party. Getting married a little later in life has its advantages—and disadvantages. But so does getting married young. Nothing will ever be perfect. There’s no such thing as perfect timing. And there’s no such thing as a perfect person or a perfect relationship. Steven reminds me of this all the time. He’s been saying it from the beginning; he probably told me on our first date knowing him.

But I love him, and he loves me. And last night when I was going through something, *he* was the one to remind me “Love fixes everything.” We don’t have to do anything perfectly as long as we do it in love. But what we do in fear will rob us—and those we love. Fear can absolutely steal our lives away.

And it was stealing mine yesterday. But my belief in Love restored me. It restored my faith and confidence in my own ability to make decisions and make right choices.

But perfectionism can steal our lives in so many ways. And that’s the thing: perfectionism is this sneaky little fear. It’s disguised as excellence.

Many of you know I graduated the North Pike class of 2002 as valedictorian, a mark of excellence. What you may not know is I didn’t graduate with perfect grades. I don’t have all A’s on my transcript or even a 4.0 GPA. But I did my best in everything I did. And that was “good enough.”

For me, excellence is doing my best. But perfectionism can steal the joy of any accomplishment or achievement I reach because it will tell me, “You didn’t do your best because you didn’t do it perfectly.” It can cause me to feel like a failure. It will put me in a mindset to turn down praise instead of allowing others the joy of celebrating in my successes. It will keep me from honoring myself.

My valedictorian award along with my other medals and ribbons are in a box out of sight because I can’t honor the work I did to reach that achievement.

And so many times perfectionism has stolen life from me. It has stolen sleep. It has robbed me of peace.

It’s such a well-disguised fear it’s easy for it to sneak in when I’m not aware. But I practice awareness and remind myself “‘Good enough’ done is better than perfect never finished.”

While the good things in life are worth the wait and don’t need to be rushed, waiting for perfection will mean never having anything.

I married an imperfect man, and he married an imperfect woman, and we have an imperfect marriage, but we have Love. And that brings us joy often and daily connection and regular communion. It staves off the loneliness that could so easily rip through our hearts and lives if we didn’t have one another.

And that’s “Good enough.”